This conversation happened last weekend:

"Sir, what is that in your bottle?"

-"Uh...Sprite, obviously."

"Sprite? You sure about that?"

-"I mean, it is a Sprite bottle so it's clearly Sprite."

"I'm sorry kid but you can't bring alcoholic beverages into this event."

-"Since when has Sprite ever had any alcohol, and why wasn't I informed of this change?"

"Okay kid, if you can drink the remaining half of that bottle as proof that it's Sprite rather than some kind of liquor, then I'll let you in."

-"Psh, that's easy."

"Wow, that was actually impressive. Alright whatever, go on in."

-"I've never partied in front of a police officer before."

"What?"

-"Nothing see ya."