Just look at these pictures and laugh or whatever, and I'll be back with more stuff tomorrow.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Instant Gratification
I've had a rather busy weekend, so the writings have been slim.
Just look at these pictures and laugh or whatever, and I'll be back with more stuff tomorrow.
Just look at these pictures and laugh or whatever, and I'll be back with more stuff tomorrow.
Friday, April 24, 2009
The Bro's Night Out: Pt I
8:00 PM - 9:00 PM
Bro 1 "Hey bro, you goin' out tonight?"
Bro 2 "Yea man, Sara is supposed to be having a kick-ass party tonight. I think we're goin over to Tweeder's to do a little pregaming. You wanna come with?"
Bro 1 “Oh fo sho. Jess and a few of her girl friends wanted to chill with us tonight I think, I’ll shoot her a text and see if she’s DTP.”
Bro 2 “Yea and if you get lucky she’ll be DTF by the end of the night.”
Bro 1 “Oh snap!”
**High-fives ensue as the bro’s head out the door to get some grubbage**
9:01 PM – 9:45 PM
Bro 2 “What are we drinkin tonight broseph?”
Bro 1 “I was thinking we’d pick up a case of Bud Light, and a case of Michelob for the ladies”
Bro 2 “Yea especially if Jess’ fatass friend Allison comes with her, know what I’m sayin?!”
Bro 1“Haha defs dude, but I don’t think we’ll have to worry about that one. I told Jess she’d better not bring that whale over or else I’d turkey-slap a hoe.”
Bro 2 “Oh, damn! You’re such a badass man!”
**Bro 1 and 2 chest-bump on their way into Albertsons Grocery**
9:46 PM – 10:50 PM
Bro 2 “You heard from the chicks yet bra?”
Bro 1 “Na dude, I’ve texted them a few times but they’re not answering. They’re probably just puttin on make-up and shit, you know how girls are.”
Bro 2 “Yea I know man, but it’s starting to get late. Maybe we should just head over to Tweed’s and tell them to meet up?”
Bro 1 “Well I texted him too, and he said they’re just gonna head out to Sara’s about 30 minutes ago…”
Bro 2 “Gotcha. Well, it looks like we’re pregaming on our own my friend. Toss me another brew, I’m already starting to feel a little buzzed anyways.”
Bro 1 “Agreed my main-man. Hey look out for the sniper over in that building.”
**Bro 2 escapes the sniper’s line of fire, Bro 1 congratulates him with a shoulder massage**
10:51 PM – 11:15 PM
Bro 1 “ Alright man you ready to head out?”
Bro 2 “ Yea lemme just put a little more cologne on and grab a few roadies.”
Bro1 “Oh yea, grab me some too if you don’t mind holmes.”
Bro 2 “ I gotcha bud. You good to drive? I think I may be drunk already dude.”
Bro 1 “Yea I’m good, toss me your keys.”
Bro 2 “Lebron, driving the lane…he shoots he scores!”
Bro 1 “Haha! Oh man, you are so hilarious. Let’s roll!”
**The Bros wrap their arms around each-other’s shoulders and head to the car**
11:16 PM – 12:30 AM
Bro 2 “Dude this party is pretty sick.”
Bro 1” Yea did you see what Sara’s friend Kristi was wearing? I would do unforgivable things to get a piece of that.”
Bro 2 “For sure bro-dy. I’ve got my eye on that one chick from our Philosophy class, you KNOW she’s gotta be a freak in the bed.”
Bro 1 “No way man, I wont let you do that. Girl’s a h.o.e. fo show. There’s no telling what all she’s got, because there’s no way she’s clean. I heard she got with Ryan Thompson one night dude, so she’s gotta be sloppy.”
Bro 2 “Fuckin’ Ryan Thompson, are you kiddin me? Damn man, I guess I’m stuck with your sorry ass tonight then.”
Bro 1 “Psh yea, except I’ll be too busy bangin the bejesus outta Kristi later.”
Bro 2 “Yea right, you wont even talk to her you pussy!”
Bro 1 “ Alright then bitch, watch me!”
**Bro 1 goes over to Kristi and her group of friends. Later, Bro 2 has to pull him out of a fight. Apparently Kristi is dating the football teams starting Middle Linebacker**
12:31 AM – 3:00 AM
Bro 2 “You alright man? You kinda got the shit kicked out of you back there…”
Bro 1 “Shut up douchebag, I coulda kicked his ass if he wouldn’t have suckerpunched me in the back of the head.”
Bro 2 “Dude, he broke your nose and gave you two black eyes…”
Bro 1 “Whatevs, nothing more beer can’t fix. We still got those Ultras back at the pad?”
Bro 2 “Shit yea we do. Let’s get wasted!”
Bro 1 “Fuckin’ wasted!!!”
**The bros delicately embrace one another as they drive thru Jack In The Box and grab a few $1 tacos. The two will spend the rest of the night playing video games and getting drunk, by themselves, in their apartment…because that’s all they need, is each others friendship. THE END.**
Bro 1 "Hey bro, you goin' out tonight?"
Bro 2 "Yea man, Sara is supposed to be having a kick-ass party tonight. I think we're goin over to Tweeder's to do a little pregaming. You wanna come with?"
Bro 1 “Oh fo sho. Jess and a few of her girl friends wanted to chill with us tonight I think, I’ll shoot her a text and see if she’s DTP.”
Bro 2 “Yea and if you get lucky she’ll be DTF by the end of the night.”
Bro 1 “Oh snap!”
**High-fives ensue as the bro’s head out the door to get some grubbage**
9:01 PM – 9:45 PM
Bro 2 “What are we drinkin tonight broseph?”
Bro 1 “I was thinking we’d pick up a case of Bud Light, and a case of Michelob for the ladies”
Bro 2 “Yea especially if Jess’ fatass friend Allison comes with her, know what I’m sayin?!”
Bro 1“Haha defs dude, but I don’t think we’ll have to worry about that one. I told Jess she’d better not bring that whale over or else I’d turkey-slap a hoe.”
Bro 2 “Oh, damn! You’re such a badass man!”
**Bro 1 and 2 chest-bump on their way into Albertsons Grocery**
9:46 PM – 10:50 PM
Bro 2 “You heard from the chicks yet bra?”
Bro 1 “Na dude, I’ve texted them a few times but they’re not answering. They’re probably just puttin on make-up and shit, you know how girls are.”
Bro 2 “Yea I know man, but it’s starting to get late. Maybe we should just head over to Tweed’s and tell them to meet up?”
Bro 1 “Well I texted him too, and he said they’re just gonna head out to Sara’s about 30 minutes ago…”
Bro 2 “Gotcha. Well, it looks like we’re pregaming on our own my friend. Toss me another brew, I’m already starting to feel a little buzzed anyways.”
Bro 1 “Agreed my main-man. Hey look out for the sniper over in that building.”
**Bro 2 escapes the sniper’s line of fire, Bro 1 congratulates him with a shoulder massage**
10:51 PM – 11:15 PM
Bro 1 “ Alright man you ready to head out?”
Bro 2 “ Yea lemme just put a little more cologne on and grab a few roadies.”
Bro1 “Oh yea, grab me some too if you don’t mind holmes.”
Bro 2 “ I gotcha bud. You good to drive? I think I may be drunk already dude.”
Bro 1 “Yea I’m good, toss me your keys.”
Bro 2 “Lebron, driving the lane…he shoots he scores!”
Bro 1 “Haha! Oh man, you are so hilarious. Let’s roll!”
**The Bros wrap their arms around each-other’s shoulders and head to the car**
11:16 PM – 12:30 AM
Bro 2 “Dude this party is pretty sick.”
Bro 1” Yea did you see what Sara’s friend Kristi was wearing? I would do unforgivable things to get a piece of that.”
Bro 2 “For sure bro-dy. I’ve got my eye on that one chick from our Philosophy class, you KNOW she’s gotta be a freak in the bed.”
Bro 1 “No way man, I wont let you do that. Girl’s a h.o.e. fo show. There’s no telling what all she’s got, because there’s no way she’s clean. I heard she got with Ryan Thompson one night dude, so she’s gotta be sloppy.”
Bro 2 “Fuckin’ Ryan Thompson, are you kiddin me? Damn man, I guess I’m stuck with your sorry ass tonight then.”
Bro 1 “Psh yea, except I’ll be too busy bangin the bejesus outta Kristi later.”
Bro 2 “Yea right, you wont even talk to her you pussy!”
Bro 1 “ Alright then bitch, watch me!”
**Bro 1 goes over to Kristi and her group of friends. Later, Bro 2 has to pull him out of a fight. Apparently Kristi is dating the football teams starting Middle Linebacker**
12:31 AM – 3:00 AM
Bro 2 “You alright man? You kinda got the shit kicked out of you back there…”
Bro 1 “Shut up douchebag, I coulda kicked his ass if he wouldn’t have suckerpunched me in the back of the head.”
Bro 2 “Dude, he broke your nose and gave you two black eyes…”
Bro 1 “Whatevs, nothing more beer can’t fix. We still got those Ultras back at the pad?”
Bro 2 “Shit yea we do. Let’s get wasted!”
Bro 1 “Fuckin’ wasted!!!”
**The bros delicately embrace one another as they drive thru Jack In The Box and grab a few $1 tacos. The two will spend the rest of the night playing video games and getting drunk, by themselves, in their apartment…because that’s all they need, is each others friendship. THE END.**
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Why We Choose The Luxury Vehicles We Do
I saw this picture of two billboards in Santa Monica, California the other day, and it made me wonder: why can't I be exposed to such clever advertising on a daily basis? I feel as though it'd make all of my days that much better, no matter how shitty or fantastic it had been previously. Not only that, but it makes me want to buy the product. A week before the BMW billboard went up, I would have wanted to purchase the Audi A4. As a standalone piece of advertising, it's not all that bad. It's short, elegant, clever, and somewhat witty....much like my pickup lines. However, a week later the BMW billboard was up and BAM! I'm suddenly faced with a tough decision.
These two companies have forced the consumer body to increase our decision-making skills by simply putting up a picture of a product followed by a few words. In doing so, however, there are many questions one might ask before coming to a conclusion. For instance, someone may ask themselves "Well, BMW may have won the game of chess between the two in one move...which clearly means that BMW had a tough time growing up as a teen, and the only thing he could pick up to take his mind off of the bullies was chess. Audi, on the other hand, will probably just beat up BMW for being such a nerd once he realizes he's been beaten."
On the other side of the argument, there are the more kind-hearted people that feel for BMW for getting beat up for being such a loser nerd. "Audi is trying to compensate for something...probably the fact that his dad ran away from home when he was 7 and his mother is an alcoholic. That's the only reason he feels like he has to punch BMW in the face, is to protect himself from the emotional despair that's tearing him up from the inside-out." In this particular case, the consumer will feel obligated to purchase a BMW 325i simply because he or she is trying to protect the poor bastard. But then, who would protect Audi?...from himself?
This is where the riskier consumers step in, the ones with tons of ambition and confidence. Why, you may or may not ask? Simply because these type of consumers understand the value of taking something of beauty (in this case, the Audi) that has been covered in guilt and regret, and to transform it into something beautiful and breathtaking. When you see a BMW driving around town, you don't pay much attention to it because you know that the people driving him aren't really that interesting. However when an Audi A4 comes your way, not only do you feel short of breath, but your eyes can't help but to follow it out of sight, knowing that the most interesting, funny, and handsome person in the world was just within viewing distance from your humble self. Some like to call this moment the "Shock and Awe affect."
In closing, I pose one simple question: which type of person are you? Are you the commonman, boring individual who can't make important decisions or tell interesting stories at social gatherings that went with the BMW? Or are you the well-dressed, financially-secure-during-tough-economic-times, and physically in-shape consumer that made the bold choice of driving an Audi?
The choice is yours, folks. Who are you gonna be?
Don't let that potatowrangler fool you...these cars mean SERIOUS BUSINESS!
Hi hi hi there.
Hi, my name is Logan, and this is my "blog." Unfortunately for my social well-being, I've been pulled into this pointless internet sensation. So, to get to know me a little better, I've decided to be incredibly original and list 5 things about myself that you probably don't know. Ready...set..
1) I like to read, but I only read about 1 book every 3 or 4 months. I've got to keep my real-life public persona in check, ya know. If some people knew that I actually enjoy reading, I'd probably have about 10% fewer friends than I do now. (which is about 934 people, by the way. No big deal or anything.)
2) I've tasted close to 40 different kinds of beer. Sometimes I like to consider myself a connoisseur of beer. I'm also only 20 years old which also makes me a LAW BREAKER OH MY GOD!
3) I had to look up how to spell connoisseur. I originally spelled it as "connesuer." I have no shame. Don't judge me because you probably didn't know how to spell it either. Ass.
4) I'm terrifyingly good at Call of Duty (a video game). However, I don't play often at all...perhaps once a week. Thank you, God, for blessing me with the natural ability to be good at this video game instead of being incredibly fast or good-looking.
5) I will never, ever, for the rest of my life, not have at least a little bit of stubble on my face. During the winter, I am very similar to a bear: I purposely get fatter and grow a beard, so as to stay warm. In February/March, I deeply regret such a decision and get into super extreme workout mode in attempt to become skinny again for the Spring and Summer months. Oh, and about the stubble or shadow, at least, my theory is that a real man has facial hair, no excuses.
So there's five things that you're INCREDIBLY EXCITED ABOUT!
Stay tuned folks, more to come. Maybe...I may get bored and/or forget about this thing a month from now and never write anything again. But maybe not. We'll see.
NOTE: Pics Unrelated.
1) I like to read, but I only read about 1 book every 3 or 4 months. I've got to keep my real-life public persona in check, ya know. If some people knew that I actually enjoy reading, I'd probably have about 10% fewer friends than I do now. (which is about 934 people, by the way. No big deal or anything.)
2) I've tasted close to 40 different kinds of beer. Sometimes I like to consider myself a connoisseur of beer. I'm also only 20 years old which also makes me a LAW BREAKER OH MY GOD!
3) I had to look up how to spell connoisseur. I originally spelled it as "connesuer." I have no shame. Don't judge me because you probably didn't know how to spell it either. Ass.
4) I'm terrifyingly good at Call of Duty (a video game). However, I don't play often at all...perhaps once a week. Thank you, God, for blessing me with the natural ability to be good at this video game instead of being incredibly fast or good-looking.
5) I will never, ever, for the rest of my life, not have at least a little bit of stubble on my face. During the winter, I am very similar to a bear: I purposely get fatter and grow a beard, so as to stay warm. In February/March, I deeply regret such a decision and get into super extreme workout mode in attempt to become skinny again for the Spring and Summer months. Oh, and about the stubble or shadow, at least, my theory is that a real man has facial hair, no excuses.
So there's five things that you're INCREDIBLY EXCITED ABOUT!
Stay tuned folks, more to come. Maybe...I may get bored and/or forget about this thing a month from now and never write anything again. But maybe not. We'll see.
NOTE: Pics Unrelated.
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